No matter how much inner work we have done there are days when we wake up and feel ‘’out of balance’’, days when we got triggered by others and events, moments when it feels like we are experiencing the same old. We often can’t even find a reason ‘’why’’ without looking deeper.
What I have realized, when I have these moments my biggest frustration is not about having negative emotions but the fear that I am going back to the same old stuff I have worked on. It feels like ‘’I am not supposed to experience it again’’. Who told me that?:)
What are the strategies the majority of people apply when they feel down? Running away, ignoring, numbing, distracting ourselves with short-term pleasures, eating, alcohol, and lots of work…anything in order not to feel. Running away is like sweeping something smelly under the carpet – we might not see it, but it still smells. Or we fight against the way we feel…’’I am not supposed to feel this way’’. Fighting creates resistance and as you might have heard: what we resist only persist. Resistance creates more of what we do not want to experience. Or another strategy is to allow negative emotions to take full control over us and we close ourselves off.
None of these strategies bring long-term results and healing. I used to fight against the way I felt…fight against the part which is me…until I have learned the biggest lesson.
Acceptance of all things and feeling through…
We are all things and everything has the right to exist! We have been born with the full spectrum of emotions; we are both light and darkness.
You might ask “Then what is the purpose of all personal development work if we will keep on experiencing sadness, anger, frustration for the rest of our lives?
Inner work happens in steps and contrast is a necessary part of the transformation. The evidence of personal development work is not in ever feeling negative emotions again, but in how gracefully and fast you can move through all the experiences, learn the lesson and get back on track.
What is the gift in experiencing negative emotions? Your higher self (opposite to ego), your soul loves you so much so that it always wants you to become a better version of self. It wants to show you what you still need to work on, what you still need to heal on your expansion journey. That’s why it attracts experiences into your life that reveal your next growth opportunity…if you choose to see it
So, instead of running, fighting, or shutting down can you just remain open, accept and embrace your emotions fully. Sit down with them and feel. Notice and observe the sensations in your body. What helps me is to laugh at myself ‘’ok, darling, you feel sh*ty, it’s ok, one of those days’’. Acceptance creates ease and allows energy blocks to be released.
Now, when you accept, ask yourself ‘’what these emotions are trying to show me’’, ‘’which belief I am still holding to’’. Don’t try to analyze it with your ego mind; the first intuitive answer is normally the right one.
Can you even love the way you feel? Can you love anything about it?
Now that you are aware and have accepted the way you feel make a powerful choice: do I want to stay with these emotions or how do I want to feel instead?
All our emotions serve the purpose, learn the lesson, process and release but avoid being indulged in your negative feelings!
There is a difference between feeling through and indulging in negative emotions. Sometimes, and I was guilty for this too, we choose to hold on to feeling sad, angry, unworthy…whatever is your thing and this is why. There are some perceived short-term benefits, such as getting attention from people we would not normally get or using feeling sad, unworthy, frustrated as an excuse of not moving forward and creating different results but holding on to our story. This is happening subconsciously and it requires going deeper and see the root of the problem: why are you choosing to stay with your negative emotions, what are the benefits. Be honest with yourself!
At every moment live the energies you want to see in the future. Whenever you feel triggered – accept, embrace, learn the lesson and release. You are creating as you are breathing.
Stay extraordinary!
Leave A Response